Slept too late to write a real post

Oh, hi there!  Right now, it's 7:26am.  Happy Wednesday!  My cat is sitting directly in front of my laptop, on top of me and digging his claws into my left arm, so if this has strange, not at all right typos, please forgive me.

Since it's 7:26am and this is the only blog post you're getting from me today, you should just accept right now that it's going to be random, short, and have a YouTube video in it.  Sorry to those of you who read your blogs at work, maybe you should grab some headphones on your lunch break, because this is a GOOD ONE y'all.

Why wasn't I a prepared blogger who wrote my post last night like I usually do?  Because we were too busy trying to get service at the T-Mobile store (we didn't), returning a couple of gifts to Kohl's (we sure do spend a lot of time there these days), and drinking wine and eating dinner while watching Korean drama.  We're at the best part in our current show, and I made Ammon watch 2 full episodes with me last night.  It's really hard to blog and read subtitles at the same time.  By the time that was done, it was 10:30, 30 minutes past bedtime.  Which is probably why I woke up at 7 am instead of 6 am.  Oops.  Oh well, nothing a little extra coffee can't fix.

So, the video... some of you have already seen this, because we're Facebook friends, or because I like you enough to email you about important things in my life.  So if you're one of those people, you get a free pass for not watching today.  For the rest of you, get excited, because it's my wedding video!!!  It goes directly into the receiving line, which is only interesting to me, so you can skip that part if you'd like.  Also, yes, one of my wedding guests did show up to my wedding dressed as a Farmer.  There's a hilarious story about it too, but you would have to understand my family pretty intimately to really get it. 

And there you have it!  Hope you have a FANTASTIC Wednesday, and that you're happier than a Camel on Hump Day.

Three strikes, you're out

When I think about the run I had on Saturday, all I can think of is that line from Maroon 5's She will be loved:  "It's not always rainbows and butterflies, it's compromise that moves us along".  That song has been in my head every time I consider even the smallest moment of that run.  Because running is  a lot like being in a relationship.  There are good times, and there are bad times.

Saturday was one of the bad times.

I have been pretty lax about training for the half marathon that I have on August 10th, but I wasn't all that worried, because I have been doing a ton of cross training, and when I do go running, it usually is amazing.  Slow, but amazing.  Such a new sensation for me to not want to hate life at the thought of going for a run, let alone voluntarily getting up at 5am on a Saturday to run multiple miles.  Since I have been lax, I decided that it would be a good idea to try 10 miles or so and see how it felt.  I knew that I would walk part of it (even though secretly I hoped that I would feel amazing and run the whole thing) and I felt really at peace about that.  I don't plan on running my entire first half marathon, I am hoping to accomplish that at the Shiner beer run in November, which you should all totally run with me.  Right now, I think the super-tastically-awesome Nerky is going to do it too, which would make me so unbelievably happy.

Oops, tangent.  Anyway, so I knew that 10 miles of running was probably out of the question, so I planned to run 5, walk 2, then run the last 3.  I really wanted to be out the door by 6:30am or so, but didn't make it out until 7:30am.  Strike one, Saturday.

I actually felt pretty good when I started.  I was feeling my glutes and my hamstrings a little bit more than usual, but I chalked that up to muscle fatigue and kept going.  The first 5 miles, in fact, felt pretty great.  I ran all the way out to a local state park, and was exploring around the lake area.  However, I felt like it would be wise to take my walking break.  I am convinced my walking break was my ultimate downfall.  All of a sudden, my legs started cramping like you wouldn't believe.  I kept walking, and it seemed to get better.  Then, at mile 6.1, my phone died, which is what I use for music and GPS tracking.  Oh yeah, and general safety:  strike 2 for my Saturday run.  My phone has been not-so-great lately, so I should have expected it, but I was still pretty grumpy about the whole thing.  I walked for what I guessed was about another mile or so, and then I started jogging again.

This time, the jogging didn't feel very good at all.  My glutes were starting to really feel it, and it was radiating into my hips and knees.  I managed to breathe through it for what I think was a mile and a half before I could go no more.  My knees felt like there were over-tightened rubber bands inside of them, and my left hip was SCREAMING at me.  I was running along a fairly-busy road, and didn't feel like it was safe to stop and stretch for long periods of time, so I stretched for a minute or so, and started walking the last mile and a half-ish home.  It was strike three.  I was tired, my legs hurt, I had no way of calling Ammon for sag support.  I didn't have enough water with me.  I had to finish.  NO MATTER WHAT, I had to get home.

And sure enough, I made it home.  In fact, by the time I got home, my legs felt pretty good again.  Whatever weird kink got into my glutes seemingly worked itself out over the course of the day, even though I walked like a granny for the rest of the day.  Sunday and yesterday I felt pretty okay, even though I can definitely tell there is some really strange tightness going on there.

It was a run full of compromise.  It wasn't what I wanted.  It freaked me out to have no way of calling for help.  It worried me that my body won't cooperate when push comes to shove.  But it also taught me that I CAN adapt, I CAN push through a difficult situation, and I CAN finish what I set out to do.  This hard run is teaching me to be a better runner.  It's teaching me to accept my physical limitations.  It's teaching me that it's okay to scale down, and to only do what you can reasonably and safely do.  These lessons give me hope that I can find a way to finish my first half marathon, even if it isn't the plan that I have set for myself, and even if it's slower than I had originally hoped for.  I can finish the right way.  I have that power and ability.

And most important also really exciting, I got to eat a ridiculous breakfast afterward, including splitting some biscuits and gravy with Ammon as a breakfast appetizer.  I think that the breakfast appetizer needs to become a legit thing.

We didn't take pictures of food, it wasn't on the table long enough before it was gone.  Suffice it to say, I was a hungry, hungry hippo.

So there you have it;  my explanation for why a bad run can be far more valuable than a good run.  And why breakfast appetizers are always, always, always a good idea.  Have a wonderful day!

Fun facts: The Mister Edition

I feel like you all hardly know Ammon.  Which is sad, because he's about 80 times more interesting and entertaining than I could ever hope to be.  So I would really like to spend some time today letting you get to know each other better.

After all, he is always telling me that I don't spend nearly enough time talking about him in this space.

1)  When we first started dating, several of our co-workers, and even one of our bosses mentioned how Ammon does not tend to show a lot of outward emotions.  And it's true;  sometimes you have to just guess about his excitement level about different things.  Like, he'll be pretty stoked about something, and you might never know it.  Then, because you don't know, you brush it off, and only later once he's disappointed do you you learn the truth.

2)  He loves to learn anything and everything that he can get his hands on, with little regard for the subject.  He just likes to learn and to know everything. 

3)  Along with wanting to learn everything, he has an insatiable curiosity, and likes to wonder about things.  Some of him favorite things to wonder about are structural integrity of buildings and tunnels, how to manufacture plants that create valuable or hard to make chemical compounds, and ways to make alternative energy viable.

4)  Homeslice reads books the way most blogger women watch the Real Housewives of Anyplace.  With great vigor and voracity.  He loves them so much, in fact, that he has book reader programs on his phone, and one of them even reads the books aloud to him, so that he can keep up with books while driving, showering, doing just about everything.

5)  He loves to talk about preparing for the zombie apocalypse.  He thinks it's important and valuable.

6)  He hates the color yellow.  I have never heard him so strongly dislike of another color, ever.

7)  He's an animal lover.  Here he is with the cat at our favorite distillery, just chilling together.

8)  He indulges my blogger quirks, like my insistence on taking pictures of him, or food, everywhere we go, and sometimes even at home.  I haven't worked up the nerve to ask him to regularly document my outfits, however.  I don't think he's quite ready for that level of blusband-ness.

9)  He's a fantastic dancer.  I always look like a fish flopping on the shore when I dance, so I tend to get a little jealous of his skills.

10)  He's ridiculously athletic.  He can try something physical just once or twice, and become really good at it.  He decided to take up gold, for instance, and saw drastic improvement in his scores in just 2 sessions.

So there you have it!  Just a few fun facts about the love of my life.  Here's hoping that he doesn't mind me sharing them with you, it's a surprise =).

Happy Jams!

I haven't been this thrilled for a Thursday in a long, long, long time.  Hopefully you all feel the same way.  If not, jam out to a few of these, post your own happylicious jams on your blog, and then let me know where to find them in the comments section.  Happy listening!

My newest, most favorite happy jam right now...


This next one is graphic... so if you don't like that, just know it's all about flippy-floppies.


And for those of you who are hippie-dippies like me...



I really hope those 3 do the trick for you, and just know that I have lots more coming.  Also, please share your jams!  Happiness is meant to be shared.  Have a great day!

That's fun...

The first few sentences of every blog post baffle me.  Every. Single. Day.  I've been doing this for over a year and a half now, you would think I would have this figured out.  Nope, guess not.  Hmmm.

So, yesterday my legs were supah sore.  I decided to run sprints after my cardio circuit, and it seems to have made a big impact on my ability to properly function yesterday.  Every time I went out onto property to do something, it took twice as long as it should have.  Also, it made me flippin' HANGRY yesterday.

And then last night I did a Lower Body workout.  Oh my word.  I wish that you could have seen the ridiculousness, because this is what I chose to use as weights.

White wine bottles.  Why?  Because our lightest weights are 10lbs, and there was no way on this Earth or the next that I was using 10lb weights or heavier yesterday.  So I improvised.  And then I realized how epic it is that the first thing I found that met my criteria was 2 full bottles of white wine.

I am absolutely certain that I will feel this decision just as much as if I had drank from one of those bottles.  I hope I don't regret it as much.

Also, I want to start a new, fun thing tomorrow, I'm calling it "Happy Jams".

 Since I hate Thursdays more than should be allowed, I feel like it is a great opportunity to share some of my happiest music, the songs that can make even Thursday feel better instantly.  I would love it if you decided you wanted to join the fun, but I'm too insecure about my idea lazy to do a link-up.  So instead, let's just all put some happy songs on our blog, and then put links in my comments.  Acceptable submissions include any songs, embarrassing or not, that never cease to bring you incredible joy and happiness.  If you need further inspiration, email me.  I have been compiling a mental list of Happy Jams since Monday in anticipation.  I can't wait to see what you guys come up with too!

Now go and tackle this hump of a day.  You've got this.

It happened

On Sunday, I posted about how I have a thrifting problem.  A couple of you asked for pictures of our latest find, even going so far as to say, "If you don't post pictures, it didn't happen".  So I got in touch with the blusband (blogger husband), and politely requested he forward me the pictures we had.  As an aside, if any of you know anyone who is good with furniture and antique appraisals, we could really use some assistance with dating and identifying this piece, so that we can determine what level of restoration is appropriate.  Thank you!  But anyway, enough of our pleas, here are the pictures.

What we saw in the store that stole my heart.  Look at the curves she has up top.  Gorgeous.

She has sexy kicks.  These are steel and leather casters, which area big part of our basis for setting the age at somewhere around 200-300 years old.  They quit using leather quite a while ago.

She protects her goodies.  Just look at those locks.  LOVELY.

 

She's built all kinds of sturdy.  Those are hand-carved dovetails.  You can tell they're hand-carved, because they aren't all the same.

From what we can tell, she used to have a mirror, but that appears to be long gone.  No matter, I just adore her, just the way she is.  Secretly, I hope that she isn't as old as we anticipate, so that we can restore her to full glory.  I'm not sure I can bear to give her to another home, even for all the dolla, dolla billz.

Would you have bought her?  What would you pay for something like this?

And... I lied a little

Well, it's Monday again.  I feel totally not prepared to be back at work today, like I really could have used an extra day off this weekend.  Then again, there's no guarantee that would have done the trick either.  So really, it just comes down to increasing my coffee intake so that I can be a decent human being.

Anyway, as of yesterday, I finished 12 full weeks on the Revolt Now! fitness program.  It felt like it went really, really fast, these last 12 weeks.  So many things changed in my life over the last 12 weeks, and it has been quite the challenge to give this program my full commitment.  However, I really have seen a lot of triumph as a result of this program as well.  I know I promised bikini pictures, and I really meant to have Ammon take some, but it just didn't happen.  And really, I'm okay with that, because I am far more impressed these days with my non-scale victories.

These comparison photos are from weeks 0-6.  I thought I would reprise them just to give you an idea of the kind of physical transformation that I saw.

Other victories:

~ My favorite dress slacks from Ann Taylor are on the verge of being too loose in the waist.  I owned these pants for well over a year before I was able to fit into them.

~ I can do 12 push-ups on my toes.  At the start of week 1, I could do 2... kind of.

~ I ran a 10k on Saturday.  As in, I ran the entire 6.2 miles, no walk breaks!  It is the furthest I have now run in my entire life without having to take a walking break, and I did it in 1 hour, 11 minutes.

~ I did not hurt myself.  Last year when I did a 12 week challenge, I hurt myself pretty badly.  In fact, with a lot of exercise programs I end up having to really back off, because I have hurt myself.  Not this time!  Love that the exercises are same, and that modifications are encouraged.

~ I lost weight and gained muscle the right way.  Yes, it was flipping hard, but it was really effective, and I have never seen these kinds of results from any other program.  I have the problem of being the rare girl who really does "bulk up" when she lifts, but I think now that this phenomenon has more to do with poor diet than anything else.

I would be remiss if I did not talk about my personal hardships with this program.  I want you to understand what made it really tough for me, and be able to make an honest decision about if this is a program that could work in your everyday life.  Not every program is for everyone!

~ Eating 5-6 times a day.  I just can't do this.  I really HATE snacking in general, but then when you mix in how hectic my office is, it just isn't practical.  There are days when it would take me 3 hours to eat a garden salad, because there was so much going on.

~ NO BEER.  Well, except for your one cheat day a week.  And I understand that alcohol adds a lot of calories, and that beer can cause belly bloat.  I get all of that.  But telling me that I can only have beer/wine 1 day a week is not necessarily sustainable.  Before starting this diet, there were a lot of weeks where I wouldn't drink at all... I just think I dislike knowing that I'm not "supposed" to have it.

~ Calorie/macro breakdowns are not disclosed:  Nichole, the founder of Revolt, is always recommending that if you are losing too much weight, or if you want to go into maintenance, that you add approx 100 calories to your daily intake.  Well, that's all well and good, but I don't even know what I'm taking in to begin with!  I'm sure that plenty of people plug their intake into a food journal, and that's fab, but since I'm following the plan as written, I have never seen the need.  It would be really nice to see the caloric breakdown of the meal plans, as well as the breakdown of fats/carbs/protein.  This way, when I go into a maintenance diet, or I decide to substitute a different meal, I can try to approximate my total calories and macronutrient distribution.

Overall, I have really enjoyed this program.  Like I said, it has really helped me increase my fitness level by leaps and bounds, and I haven't gotten injured in the process.  I will definitely be continuing on, but I am changing up some of the food options moving forward, and giving myself fewer rules and restrictions pertaining to alcohol.  I want to integrate these kinds of workouts into my lifestyle, because they are short, yet effective, and the diet plan really makes planning, purchasing, and preparing food easy.  I would also recommend this plan to anyone who is interested in making a change in their life, and feel like they need a lot of structure.  Everything is taken care of with this plan, you just have to commit to following it.  If you do, I promise that you will see results too.

*Disclaimer:  Revolt Fitness offered me a free membership in exchange for a review of their services.  All testimony and opinions are my own.

Sunday confessions are back!

Did you know that my bloggy bestie Alyx is back in the saddle with her "Sunday Confessions" link-up?  She started it again last week, and you'd better believe that I was all over that like white on rice.




1) I pinky promised Alyx I would participate this week, and then promptly forgot until I saw her post in my bloglovin' feed this morning.  Oops.

2) I slept for 11 hours straight last night, AND I took a nap yesterday afternoon.  It's one of the laziest weekends I've had yet.

3) I believe that running anything more than 3 miles gives me license to eat exactly what I want, whenever I want.  I get so ridiculously hungry after a long run!

4) I am a serious thrift store junkie.  We are in the habit now of going every single weekend, and I always find at least 3 things that "I want, I want, I want!"  It's a terrible habit, one that I justify by the proceeds going to a good cause, and everything being really cheap.  This week we bought an incredible antique dresser that MIGHT be from the 1700's, and I got a pretty new dress.  I already know what furniture we will be looking at next week too.

5)Alyx knows me incredibly well, and made sure that I saw this picture this week:



It's almost true... except that it usually takes 2 cups ;)

Hope you all are having a wonderful weekend!

Have your pizza and eat it too

On Sunday evening, I posted a picture on Instagram of some incredible yumminess. 

My sweet mother in law asked me for the recipe, and being the generous person I am, I decided that all of you deserve to have this recipe.  It's one that came to me from the Revolt diet plan, and I have to say, it has been a total game changer on how I feel about this program. 

It's gluten free.  It's vegetarian.  It's flipping DELISH.  It's a little labor intensive, but if you make it, you will clearly see how worth it this is.  So without further ado...

Margherita Pizza with Cauliflower Crust

What you need:

• 1/2 head cauliflower
• 1 1/2 cups low-fat mozzarella cheese (divided)
• 1 egg
• salt and pepper
• tomato sauce
• 1 cup cherry tomatoes, halved
• basil -- small package

What you do:

• First things first, turn on your fans/AC.  It's gonna get hot in here.
• Pre-heat your oven to 425 degrees.
• Grate your cauliflower with a food processor or box grater.  If you use a box grater, protect your fingers -- those bad boys are scary as heck.
• Microwave your cauliflower for 8 minutes, then allow it to cool.  It should be soft, but not super mushy.
• Mix the grated cauliflower, one whole egg, one cup of mozzarella, and salt and pepper.  This is the basis of your crust.
• Take a cookie sheet and put parchment paper on top.  Dump your crust mixture on there and pat it out into a flat, even, roundish shape.
•  Bake your crust for 10-15 minutes, until golden and awesome.  Mine took 12 minutes, but I'm at 4900 feet above sea level, so if you aren't, you've probably gotta go longer.
• Marvel at how delicious it's already looking.  Holy smokes.
• Spread your tomato sauce on top with a spatula.  Sprinkle your remaining 1/2 cup of cheese, cherry tomatoes, and basil on top.  You can chop up your basil if you want, but I like the look of whole leaves of basil.  This is your mouth party.
•  Stick that yummy awesomeness in your oven again for another 5 minutes or so.  It will be all melty and yummy and bubbly.  When it's out, cut it up and enjoy.  

 Each pizza makes 4 Kristen-sized servings. 

 
Okay friends, go out and have a great weekend.  Make good choices!

Finish this...

I'm sure that by now, you guys know that I think Holly is pretty cool... so cool, in fact, that I decided to sponsor her for the month of July!  She hosts some really super fun link-ups, like today's, which is "Finish the Sentence".

If I had one extra hour in the day...  I would go crazy with the fact that there would be a 13 o'clock in there at one end of the day, but not the other.  Symmetry, people.  It's a beautiful thing.
I wish my name...  CHANGE was not so complicated.  This getting married and changing your name thing is tough.

 
I think anything chevron is... Less awesome than anything polka-dotted, but still acceptable.
My last nightmare...  was undoubtedly work related
Sometimes... I like socks, but not very often, and never in the summer.
My last meal on earth would be...  Mexican food with a gigantic bowl of guacamole on the side, spicy style, with cake and ice cream with whipped cream and sprinkles for dessert
I would much rather be myself than popular.
Mayonnaise...  Is one of the most vile, wretched foods on the planet, right up there with Blue Cheese.
10 years ago, I didn't think...  I would ever in a million years work in an office
Selfishly...  I like it when Ammon sleeps in on the weekends and I get extra time to myself.
My favorite show on TV right now...  Is a show from Japan that I'm watching on Hulu+ like some weird person who reads their tv shows.

Via

 
And, George Zimmerman...  If I had tv and knew why he was on trial, I might have an opinion, but since I don't have tv, I don't have any clue what this is about.  I'm a horrible human being who cares more about Asian television shows than American current events.  Whoops.

Anyway, that's that.  Thanks for sticking with that one, and for hanging in there on my least favorite day of the week.  My new mantra is "I get to have coffee today, and that makes today okay."  Not kidding, it's really my new mantra.  Tell me what your current mantra is in the comments below... I know that some of you must have some pretty good ones.  Have a great day!

It's time to begin

I really feel that it might be necessary to give myself a pep talk today.  Yesterday was a really, really tough day.  Like, the kind of day where you feel totally defeated mentally and emotionally, then you go home, put on your workout clothes, and notice that your pants are definitely giving you muffin top.  Your husband pretends he isn't seeing it, when you can totally tell that he's working REALLY hard to make sure you don't cry.

Tears are husband kryptonite.  With great power comes great responsibility, so use that knowledge wisely.

So this is the pep talk I will give myself today.  Fingers crossed it does the trick.

Good morning, Gorgeous;

Yes, you, sunshine!  You just took the most important step in making today successful:  you joined the day.  Now, your mission is to stay present in this day until 10:00pm.  There's going to be a lot going on.  Work has been busy, and you're undoubtedly tired.  It's okay.  You've got this.  And might I say, you sure are looking fit and healthy today.  All of your time, effort, and hard work is really paying off for you.  So jump out of bed, and embrace this moment in time.  It's time to begin.  It's time to do your best.  It's even time to drink some coffee.

I knew I would grab your attention if I brought coffee into this.  But more importantly, it's just simply time to be yourself.  Stop caring so much if that means you are nice enough, smart enough, funny enough, sexy enough, or competent enough, and just do you. 

And if all else fails, and you start to lose your cool, remember that these three little monkeys love you an awful lot... what more than that could you ever need?

That's right, nothing.  So go grab those horns and hang on.  It's going to be quite the ride.

Love,
The determined not to be defeated you

I want my Slurpee back

I always wonder what you guys would think if I posted about my weekends, and assumed you all would find it really interesting and entertaining.  So we'll do an experiment today:  I'm going to pretend it's really fascinating, and you react.  Ready, go.

Friday night after work I decided to make some really poor life choices.

These poor life choices eventually led to me shooting the breeze with a guy that I've known since 1st grade.  We thought it would be fun to walk down memory lane and heckle just about every person we have ever known.  Around 1:15 am, we finally called it quits, and Ammon came to rescue me from myself.  That's right, my award winning husband drove 25 minutes to pick me up, and another 25 minutes home.  He also brought me a bottle of water, and took my Pina Colada Slurpee away until I drank the water.  It was totally rude.

Saturday we slept in until 11am.  By the time we dragged our butts out of bed, we decided it was high time we head over to Kohl's to take advantage of some sales, and buy some of our unpurchased wedding registry items.  We managed to buy 4 place settings of Fiesta, a new shower curtain, shower curtain liner, shower curtain hooks, and toothbrush holder, all for $140.  I couldn't be contained, I was so excited.

Since we were on a roll, we opted to stop by the Thrift Store to see if they had any great deals for us.  One of our favorite things is finding great furniture to restore, or random, interesting things.  We found a really old set of flameless road-flares, and a vintage Craftsman push-mower.  After looking them up online, we realized these things were worth some scrilla, so we hustled them over to the check-out.  Since our friend owns a Vintage consignment shop, we knew that was going to be our very next stop.  After lunch, that was.  Cafe Rio, to be exact.  Ammon really likes their Nachos, so now I'm assured that he will offer Cafe Rio as a lunch or dinner option at least once a week.  It's a good thing.

When we got to our friend Viv's shop, she assured us that the things we had were ultra-cool, and we got down to business setting prices.  I also looked through some embroidery iron-on patterns, because I'm just that edgy.  Before we left, there was already an inquiry about the push-mower.  Score.  I went home after that, and Ammon went to the garage to work on a laundry hamper he is currently building.

That night, I got to chat with Alyx.  She is the best new mom in the whole entire world, it is official.




Aren't they adorable???  I just love it.  She is teaching her daughter the importance of bathroom selfies and spreading the social media love from a very young age.

On Sunday we slept in again.  I don't know what my problem is, but lately I have not been satisfied with any less that 10 hours of sleep a night on the weekends.  While it makes me feel kind of lazy, it's also a nice change of pace from the typical weekend.  We went to Home Depot for hot dogs...

And then I went to Sam's Club to get my grocery shopping on.  Ammon went to the shop again.  I'm not kidding you when I say that this laundry hamper is going to be the most insane thing he has ever constructed.  I then went ahead and prepped my meals for this week, including the most amazing and incredible flour-less gluten free pizza known to man.

After trying it yesterday, I don't know how I ever lived without this.  It is, without a doubt, the yummiest low-carb pizza-like option on the planet.

And then I found $5.

That's a lie.  But it made the story better?

Anyway, I'm done now.  That was our weekend.  I can tell you are totally enthralled, right???

Is it really almost over?

Well, it's official.  This marks week 12 of my Revolt Now! Fitness journey.  Next week I will have bikini pictures again... I know I haven't posted progress pictures in a while, and that's because there's been nothing really to post.  I haven't been pushing as hard in the second half of the program as I did in the first half.

However, I really have to stress, that even half-assing this program, I have seen some pretty tremendous results.  I can run for longer than ever.  I can do 12 push-ups in a row on my toes, and hold minute long planks again.  I am moving quickly towards a level of fitness that I haven't seen since I was rock climbing 5 days a week back in 2008.

You can't see them in this picture, but I had guns.  And my stomach was super flat.  Then again, I wasn't eating meat or dairy.  And I worked out constantly.  These things may have contributed to the overall tininess I saw at that time.  Now, with 20-30 minute workouts, and substantial amounts of animal-based foods in my diet, I feel pretty confident that I'm looking almost as good.

Last week, I set some fitness goals for myself.  They were:

1) Complete 4 out of 5 Revolt workouts scheduled for the week
2) Run 2-3 times during the week
3) Take melatonin and be in bed by 10pm every night

For the sake of accountability, here is how I did:

1) Crushed it.  Skipped the cardio circuit on Thursday, but did every other workout.
2) Failed.  I got in one run on Thursday evening.  It always seemed either too hot to run, or it was storming bad.  These aren't very good excuses, since I own a treadmill, but they are the stories I told myself to avoid doing all of my prescribed runs.
3) I didn't do the melatonin every night, but from Sunday night through Thursday night, I managed to be in bed by 10:20pm.  To me, this was a huge victory, because my sleep got really thrown off with the wedding, and it's been a big challenge to get back on track.

For this week, I want to keep my goals the same.  It was a push to come as close as I did to accomplishing them last week, so I hope that they continue to push me this week.  It's important that I get in the running this week, since I have a 10k on Saturday morning.  Hopefully, I can do what it takes to finish out week 12 strong!

**Disclaimer**  I was provided a free membership to Revolt Fitness in exchange for my unbiased opinions and reviews.  All opinions are 100% my own.

If I won the lottery

I am so late to this game that it isn't even a little bit funny.  Apparently, this link-up was for yesterday, but I didn't know until yesterday, and I already had a post written, so then I figured I would jump on that ish today.  Besides that, I totally got paid yesterday, so I'm feeling rich a little less po, and I want to talk about spending some moolah.

Did you give a flip about any of that?  No?  Dang.  Well, on with the show.



If When we win the lotto (even though we only play 1-2 times a year)

1)  Our future children will be home-schooled, and we will jet them all over the world to learn the languages where they're spoken, learn history where it happened, and mom and dad will eat all the foods.

2)  We will buy a super-sweet ski-in, ski-out house at a big resort, like Copper.

3)  I'll move my massage therapist and his family into our guest cottage, and then pay him to give me twice weekly massages.  Heaven.

4)  I'll hire a driver.  No more driving anxiety for me!

5)  I will buy all of the cute hippie-dippie wrap skirts at the local Nepali-import shop, and spend my life looking like I live to commune with Patchouli and nature.

6)  I will also buy the entire Ann Taylor dress collection for those times when hippie-dippie wrap skirts are not socially acceptable.

7)  Ammon will go to culinary school, and learn how to cook without filling my house with smoke.

8)  We will buy our dream property, build Ammon's dream woodshop, build our dream [buried] house, and start my dream garden.

9)  We will buy the first ever Chipotle franchise.  This corporate-chain only nonsense would be no match against Ammon's never-ending desire to fully posses Chipotle.  Then I will finally be less grumpy when he eats it every. single. day.

10)  We will probably build a wing or something on a library somewhere.  We like books.

**Obviously, this is my frivolous list.  There are a lot of other things we would do first.  But this is the ultra-mega-powerball list of joy.

What FUN things would you do if you won the lottery?

Currently...

Currently I am having a difficult time stringing sentences together, so instead we're going to do a mash-up of some stuff I'm currently digging.

Currently watching:  Korean Dramas.  We just started one called "I do. I do."  It's such the perfect K-Drama.  For instance, this formula:

While not 100%, it does apply.  And they're so ridiculous, you have to love it.  We also love that we get to read our TV.  Subtitles are fun.

Currently Listening to:

Currently Craving:  Ice cream.  Now and always.

An old picture, but an accurate representation of how I feel about Ice Cream.

Currently Wishing:  That we could go on vacation to South Dakota this summer.  It was perfection last year.

Currently adoring:  How much thinner I am now than I was this time last year!  Those 15 pounds have made a big difference!

From the rehearsal dinner.  I can't tell you what a pleasant surprise this dress was.

What's Current for you?

Should have been required viewing

Part of my meal plan this week is these awesome frozen banana bites.  They're like peanut butter cups with a frozen banana on the inside, and they fill my life with joy.  As Ammon and I ate them last night, I asked if he thought we should open a frozen banana stand.

You know what he told me? 

...He told me that didn't sound lucrative.

REALLY???  Say it with me, people...

You all know this, right???  I'm seriously wondering how I married him without first requiring that he watch all of the old episodes of "Arrested Development".  I mean, Tobias's amazing "I shot my wad..." quote is on my Facebook profile.

We don't have Netflix, so I haven't seen the new episodes.  I don't need to.  2.5 seasons of Tobias Funke is enough to keep me laughing for life.

Besides, they torched the banana stand.  Anyway, I'm off to a field day today at work.  Just the idea of it makes me think of that episode of "The Office" where they go to the lake for "team building".  Pray for me.

Then I almost killed him

I promised that I would recap everything leading up to the wedding, and then I decided to drag it out FOREVER so that a) you wouldn't get sick of me and my dang wedding posts b) to buy time for my photographer to get me all of our wedding photos for a proper wedding recap c) to give me time to recover from recapping the Thursday before the wedding.  Also, even thinking about the Friday before the wedding tends to send me into a spiral of complete stress and unhappiness.  So there's that.

Friday morning at 4am I woke up to the window AC unit freezing over.  In order to keep the flowers cool enough, I had to bring them into my room, close the door, and crank the window AC.  Our AC is old and generally ineffective, so freezing over is common.  What isn't common is going to bed expecting your fiancee is not coming home, and then freaking out because he's in bed next to you smelling like way too much booze and naughty bachelor party shenanigans.  It was a good thing there were 5 kajillion flowers in the room to drown out some of those smells, I promise you.

After turning off the AC and finding out I wasn't as alone in bed as I thought I was, I passed back out until 6:45, when I realized that I had 15 minutes before I had to meet Heidi (Ammon's Step-mom) and Heather (Ammon's sister) at Sam's Club.  For all of you who are interested in joining Sam's, spring for the Premium membership with extended club hours.  Shopping at 7am at Sam's totally rocks.  They even have coffee for their early birds.  We needed to buy a ton of food and beverage.  I was buying food for everyone for the day, plus all of the sodas for the wedding, while Heidi was getting some stuff for the rehearsal dinner.  We managed to fill an entire flat, plus a jumbo shopping cart.  Don't mess with 3 women shopping for enough food for an army.  They mean business.

As we were leaving Sam's, I realized that I was already late for getting over to the venue.  The event rental company has scheduled delivery at 8am, and it was 8:05am.  I captured Heather and she and I made a mad dash for the venue.  Sure enough, the tent people were already there and ready to work.

Poor Heather was a total champ, and the best sister I could ever ask for.  She helped me unload a flat's worth of stuff out of my car, and then took my car back to my place to start the arduous process of waking up Ammon.  Ammon had left his car in Fort Collins, and we really needed both vehicles.  Meanwhile, I stayed back at the venue and started the long, long process of set-up.  Oh, and I posted a few pictures of everything to Instagram... because obviously, you all must love this stuff as much as I do, right?

The barn that sold me on this place.

Watching the tent go up, and admiring the perfect view of the lake out the back of the tent.

My father in law and youngest brother in law Max showed up around 10 with food for me.  I was starving by this point, and that Taco John's breakfast burrito tasted like heaven.  We talked through kind of what I wanted in terms of set-up for the ceremony space, and they told me that they would take care of it.  The great thing about Ammon's family is that they all really like to build and plan things, and so if you give them a general concept, they can run with it.

Ammon showed up around 10:35 with the archway and another brother in law, Doug.  It then took all four of the men to place the archway:

The boys promptly left after the installation of the archway, and it was just Heather, Bob, Dougie and I for a while.  We got a little work done, then everyone left on errands again while I continued setting up.  At that point, the stress was really setting in.  I had spent a good part of the morning by myself at the venue doing set-up.  It was the day before my wedding, and I was unshowered, exhausted, and totally stressed.  The following events reflect that stress.  I don't pretend that I was a cool, calm, or collected bride.

Somehow, I kept ending up alone, or with only one person to help me, and no vehicles for long chunks of time.  During these chunks of time, I could often not get ahold of anyone either, so I felt pretty dang cut off from the world.  At one point I called Ammon to find out where he was -- they were supposed to get their tuxes and then come right back, so that they could swap cars with Ammon's dad and go get some big stuff from the garage.  It turns out that the boys decided that they needed food, and instead of coming back to the venue, they went out to eat with Ammon's older brother and sister-in-law 30 minutes away at a sit down restaurant.  The things that came out of my mouth when I found this out... they might have made a biker blush.  Mind you, at this point I was moving a veritable mountain of picnic benches by myself.  I think I hung up on Ammon, but I'm not sure.  I was trying to contain some serious rage.

Ammon finally came back to the venue, this time with a couple of reinforcements, and then he left again.  He was sent on errands all day, which was really frustrating.  Every time I would turn around to ask him for help, or to even look for him, he was gone.  It made it seem like he wasn't as invested in the process, even though he was... just in a different way.  I took my reinforcements and set them to work on hanging bunting around the outside of the tent, moving tables inside the tent, and staking out where the chairs would need to be set for the ceremony.  There were so many details to focus on all at once, and I was really feeling the pressure.  Luckily, Ammon's sister-in-law, Rosa, is a total champion and saved the day more than once.  The bar was sitting really crooked, and she sought high and low for a piece of wood so that she could make it even.  She also told hilarious stories.  It was really what I needed at that point.

Finally around 2:15 I had had enough and needed a break.  I called V and told her I was going to come get her, take her to the venue to pick up where I was leaving off with set-up, and that I was going to run errands and get a massage.  As she got in the car I was mentioning that I needed to go buy a steamer still -- we had registered for one, but it hadn't been purchased, and those dresses needed a steamer like I need coffee every morning.  And wouldn't you know, my ever so sweet maid of honor told me that she was going to buy me the steamer as a wedding gift, and asked me to immediately drive to Kohl's.  There is a reason why she is my favorite.

After crying for the 5th time at how sweet my friend is, and then getting her over to the venue, I went in to Target to buy some things that were still on the shopping lists of doom -- have you ever noticed that wedding shopping lists only get longer, never shorter?  I had a meltdown where I called Ammon and cursed him out in the card aisle (I am the epitome of class), and I must have been radiating hatred, because the checker at Target didn't even bother to ask me how my day was going.  It was plain to her it wasn't good.  However, I knew a massage was only minutes away.  An hour of sweet relaxation... and perhaps the chance to restore some small modicum of sanity.

This is getting painfully long, so I'm going to cut it off here and make the rehearsal/rehearsal dinner its own separate post.  I promise it is much happier than set-up.  Really.

Blogger ate it

I tried to write a post for today last night, but blogger ate it.

Do you ever feel like you're still in Elementary School trying to come up with reasons why the homework is only half done, or not done at all?  I feel a little bit like that this morning.  Except that blogger really did eat my post.  It got ugly over here last night.

What with it being Monday and all, and having written a sort-of negative post on Friday about where I am with my health and fitness goals, I wanted to establish some small goals for this week to hopefully **fingers crossed tight** I can get back on track with working out.  Because after I wrote that post, I ignored working out, because being a happy newlywed seemed far more important.  If this becomes too much of a trend, there won't be much for that husband of mine to appreciate.

1) Do 4 out of 5 scheduled Revolt workouts this week, in the morning.  And the good news here is that I already did so this morning, so only 3 more to go!

2) Run 2-3 times this week after work, for ate least 2 miles at a time.  I signed myself up for a 10k on July 20th, and would really like to test myself and see if I can run the entire thing.

3) Take a Melatonin and be in bed by 10 every night.  Been having some weird sleep issues lately, and I think it's a contributing factor in my lack of motivation.

So those are the goals for this week.  Also, I wanted to update you guys on my Revolt weight loss progress, since I haven't done that in a while.  I am currently hovering around 143 lbs, so up a little bit from right before the wedding, but not by much.  I'm not really focusing on weight loss any more, I just want to work on my running, and see where I can get with that.  I will do some new progress pictures at the end of next week though, since by that time, I will be at the end of a 12 week cycle of Revolt.

What are your health and fitness goals for the week?

A revolt update of sorts

I have been really bad about keeping up on my Revolt Fitness updates.  I can tell you with complete honesty that this is because I just haven't been feeling the program lately.

Womp, womp.

Now here is where I use my golden excuse of my wedding.  Don't even pretend you didn't see that little gem coming.  But seriously... I tried to keep up with the workouts the week of the wedding, and that lasted until I started having 20 hours days with not a minute to spare for things like squats.  Last week I got myself back onto the diet, well, mostly back onto the diet.  I was too exhausted to work out though, and to be honest, I was in a total funk.  I had just put all of this energy into my wedding, this transformative right of passage, and then only days later I had to go back to real life and reality.  And truly, that's the state of mind I'm still in... trying to readjust back to reality where everything is the same, but it's supposed to be different at the same time.

This week our plan called for detox.  However, with my birthday and the 4th of July, it's been "follow the detox plan as well as you can, but just go with it in the end."  There has been beer, a moscow mule, Dairy Queen, yummy desserts, and a barbecue.  I haven't regretted a single bad food choice for a second this week. 

Beer on Monday.  Oh, yes.

And then there's the workouts:  I tried to "ease myself in", since I had been out of the game for a week and a half.  It was no dice, I was instantly sore from the endless litany of squats.  Knowing that I had a 5k yesterday, I decided to shift workouts around so that I did UB on Wednesday, hopefully giving my legs enough rest and healing.  It totally didn't work, and I'm walking like a geriatric cowboy today.  In theory, I should do LB tonight, but it just is not going to happen.  I'm seriously considering doing UB again tonight... I can always use more push-ups in my life!

What all of this is trying to get at is that I think the way I see my personal Revolt Fitness journey evolving is different from what I originally expected.  I went into the process with an "all or nothing" mentality about complying with the diet and exercise.  This totally worked with my neurotic "I'm a bride" mentality.  I had expected that I would get equally as neurotic about compliance after the wedding, since I have an upcoming half marathon.  I also thought that the great results I have seen in the program would continue to push me forward.  When these things didn't naturally occur, I became frustrated with myself, and wanted to give up on the program altogether.  However, after a lot of reflection, I find myself wanting to continue reaping the conditioning benefits of Revolt, without killing myself trying to be perfect with the program all of the time.  I'm not going to continue denying myself a run, because I can't make it work with the Revolt schedule, and I'm not going to deny myself a glass of red wine or a beer with my dinner either.  Instead, I want to make Revolt the template upon which I build my healthy lifestyle.

Okay, those last few sentences are kind of a lie.  I want to want 100% compliance with the program, PLUS build in running and be able to stick to the diet, but I'm not even close to being at that point yet.  So until I get there, I'm allowing myself wiggle room.  I'm also hoping that by just doing what I can, I start to re-motivate again.  That would be great.

Let Freedom ring

Today is that post where I talk about things that most people don't realize, know, or even remember about me without my careful and frequent reminders.  My first year and a half of college I spent as a Cadet in the Air force ROTC.

Can you find me in this picture?  I'm in there, along with a lot of wonderful friends, past and present.  These people are the ones I laughed, played, learned, and grew with.  These are the people who taught me what it means to be a leader, what it means to be willing to sacrifice self for the greater good, and what it means to have pride in your Country.

Outwardly, I probably don't come off as the most "Amurikah, F**k yeah!" person you'll ever meet.  I don't get teary eyed when I hear "Proud to be an American"either.  However, I will never forget the times we would be standing in formation and hear someone yell something hateful our way.  I will never forget our cadet commander telling me that what I was pledging to protect was that jerk's right to be angry with his military.

Now more than ever, I find myself identifying with those people who showed dissent.  I would never disrespect members of the armed services in that way, but I can understand why those people were angry.  And I feel intense relief knowing that I have the opportunity to have these thoughts, these feelings, because people are willing to go out and fight for something better than tyranny and oppression.

Today I thank all of my friends and family members who have given their time and their service towards upholding the Constitution of the United States.  I thank them for enduring the hatred and the negativity.  I thank them for spending long hours away from their families, and for making hard decisions.  You are all in my heart, and I am so grateful for what you have given to me.

Happy Independence Day, everyone.  I hope that whatever you choose to do today, you remember that there have been countless battles waged over your ability to make these choices.

A crazy cat lady post

Good morning, friends.  It's Tuesday morning, and the cat is laying across my arms as I type this.  Does anyone else have a cat who insists on being all up in your business all of the time?  As annoying as it can be sometimes, I've come to actually kind of like it.  I mean, it's horrible for my typing posture, and I'm sure that someday I will have Carpal Tunnel thanks to the stinker, but I'm lucky to have a cuddly cat, and not some evil cat from Hades, like this one:

Via

Ammon and I have started talking about fostering rescue dogs in the last week or so.  My friend runs the Mile High Labrador Retriever Mission, a great organization that saves Labs all over the US and brings them back to CO to find safe, loving homes.  Something you may not know about people from CO is that they really love big dogs that they can take explorin'.

I explain all of that to say that I'm a little nervous about how Sir Beckham is going to react to having to share my lap.  He's very used to getting exactly as much attention as he wants, when he wants it.  And whether it's a human or a dog, I'm nervous that instead of seeing a new playmate, he might see a threat.  We don't really want that, we just don't want our family to remain this small forever... we want to grow.  His highness came to me from a home with a small child, and he was kind of ignored there.  I hated that they didn't have enough time to give to him that they gave him up.

I just read through the last paragraph, and I realize that I am absolutely the neurotic crazy cat lady that Saturday morning cartoons warned us about.  But I'm totally alright with it.  All I can hope is that by the time we bring a new baby or dog into our home, I can figure out a way to not have the pet-owner guilt of "not loving my cat enough".

Even though this is clearly his "You must always love me the most" face.

Lessons learned

I've been riding this giant ferris wheel known as the earth all by myself for 28 years now (sorry mom, the time you carried me doesn't count here).  Today I'm at work.  It's okay.  As I get older, I realize that birthdays are more about what you have learned, and how you will proceed in the next year, than they are about having fun, getting presents, and eating cake.

Over the weekend, one of my friends pinned a graphic to her Pinterest account that was a speech Wil Wheaton gave about why it's cool to be a nerd.  I loved it, and so I went to YouTube, to see it delivered in Wil Wheaton's special way.  And I loved it even more.  You see, I have always been somewhat of a nerd.  I love fantasy novels, science, reading, sewing, needlepoint, and a mess of other "not cool" things.  And it hasn't been until these last few years that I have decided to embrace my love of these things instead of hiding from them.  It wasn't until this last year that I decided not to let other people make me feel "uncool" for liking these things, and that if they don't accept my hobbies, that's their own insecurity.  And while Wil made this speech to baby Violet, I will someday show this to my kids, boy or girl.  Self acceptance is important, and I hope my children can learn that lesson early on.

This may very well be the last birthday I have before I become a mother, and in this next year, I hope that I can learn and grow in ways that will make me a better mother.  In ways that will make me a better wife.  In ways that will make me a better human being.  If I can do these things, I will consider my 29th trip around the sun to be a rousing success.