I am not good at resting. I called in sick on Thursday, because I was feeling, well, sick. By 11:00am, I couldn't handle doing nothing. I wanted to be productive. I hate sitting all day doing nothing. So I figured I could run the self-clean on my oven. We moved in 13.5 months ago, and in that time, the oven had never been cleaned. This was my shot; I was staying home anyway, I wanted to air out my house and get some fresh air too. It seemed like the perfect plan.
Uhhhhh, no. Apparently, I need to clean my oven more often, because within an hour, my smoke and CO detectors were very angry with me, and not afraid to show it. Not good when your head feels like it's being split open from the inside.
I feel like the world may have been telling me to slow down, take a breath. I stayed home for a reason, and that reason was to get well. It's kinda like in yoga, when you push hard all the way to get to your final rest in corpse pose, and then you get up and run out the door right away. Rest only works if you allow yourself to rest. Your body can only soak up the benefits of rest if you surrender to the process of healing.
It goes against my very nature, but I want to practice letting things be, not just on the yoga mat, but off of it as well. Being able to accept where I am today is critical to where I will find myself tomorrow. I may not be where I want to be today, but if I can accept it with grace, I have a better chance of being exactly where I want to be tomorrow.
I know exactly how you feel. I have to always be doing something!
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