Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Another letter

Dear Santa Claus,

Santa, it's been 19 years since I last wrote you a letter.  I hope you forgive me.  See, I have a hard enough time remembering to write and send letters to my penpal Mia, so sending letters to a fictional character is asking far too much.  However, since I am a disgruntled blogger who is trying to get into the holiday spirit, I feel like it's fair to I should write you a letter.

I have been a good girl this year.  I haven't tried to kill a single person, or even caused massive property destruction.  I feel like this deserves an award, seeing as how a lot of people have made it their mission to drive me insane these days.  Also, I have worked really, really hard to not turn into a bridezilla.  Some people would tell you that I am one.  They are wrong, Santa.  I'm just organized.

So since I've been a good girl, I would really like for you to bring me lots of goodies on your sleigh.  I already gave a list to my mom, and so I'm going to give you a completely different list.  We don't want for the two of you to get me the same things!!!

#1:  Patience.  Oh Santa.  I need lots of this.  Up until a year or so ago, I thought I had a tolerable amount of patience.  However, I feel like what I had has been used up, and I' a little Katy Perry "firework" anymore.  So if you could bring me heaps and heaps, that would be fantastic.

#2:  Calm.  I have not felt calm for a while, Santa.  I feel like there is a tornado that sweeps through my mind about once a day, and my own inner FEMA is only about as useful as the real one.  So please Santa, bring me some calm in any manner possible.  At this point, I would probably even take it in pill form.

#3: Clarity.  I know that the answers are right there, and I just can't see them.  Please send the fog elsewhere, and let me understand.

#4:  THAT Friend.  Yes, I have friends.  I have great friends.  But I don't have a Christina Yang to my Meredith Grey.  And I yearn for that friendship.  It's the Shay and Amy friendship... our own real life Shamy, blogland.  I have an Ammon, and for that I'm so grateful, but to have a girlfriend to be that person... I just need it.

#5:  Acceptance.  Some of the things that are on the horizon are not mutable.  I will have to weather them and deal.  And that's really hard, Santa.  I'm a type-A, crazy bia who wants to control the world.  Apparently, I am no more capable of taking over the world than Pinky and the Brain were all those years ago.  So please bring me the tools I need to help deal with this.

Source: via Darcy on Pinterest

Okay Santa, there's my list.  I expect it will be no trouble, since the elves don't even have to make a single thing.  You're the best.  Oh, and can you bring me some candy canes too?  You know I love those.  There is leftover halloween candy in our freezer, please help yourself on Christmas.  And remember, we'll be staying at my parents' house, so bring my gifts there.  Capiche?

Love always,


  1. Girl - being an organized bride is SO not the same thing as a Bridezilla! You're totally in the clear!

  2. I'm just going to copy and paste this and send it to Santa. Or maybe you can just put my name on the letter as well. You know, save a tree or something.

  3. I am *with* you on #4. Soo very with you.

  4. I would love to have THAT friend too. I have good friends but not THAT friend. While we're at it, I'll take some patience too...God knows I need it!

  5. I need THAT friend too. Desperately.

    And everything else you listed.

  6. I'm with Whitney - great idea!

  7. Of COURSE I don't mind that you mention me...mention me all you want :) (I can't speak for Shay) I would ask for high levels of energy to make it through the holidays this year!!


  8. I love that you mentioned us.

    It's true, she's definitely christina though.

  9. I may have tried to kill a someone or two. But I blame it all on the pregnancy. That's legal, right? RIGHT?! :)

  10. Love this. And love you!! MUAH!!

  11. If we lived somehow closer then 2,000 miles apart would I be that friend? I'd like to think so.... although, I don't know any of those characters you mentioned. And, as we have discussed before, I hate Christmas sweaters. And I think I just failed the 'be my 'that' friend test'. Boom.

  12. Fictional? What the...?
    I was always cautioned that if you pray for patience, you may get a lot of opportunities to practice it.

  13. Dear Kristen,

    I will never, ever have patience. I can't even wish for it, because it's just not realistic. How sad.

    And that friend - I need one of those, too. Being a grown-up without that girlfriend is kinda hard. At least we have our Ammon and Mike, though!


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