Thursday, October 3, 2013

Heavy feelings

I don't really know what to say here today.  My heart hasn't been in this lately.  Keeping up with blogging on a regular, long term basis is hard work.  I've been toying with the idea of a hiatus... Not posting unless it's REALLY important, paring down my bloglovin feed to a few essentials and letting the rest go.  It's a hard decision.  For almost 2 years (!!!) now, I've been putting thought to computer screen here, sought genuine connection here.  Somehow I feel like a hiatus isn't always as temporary as one thinks it will be.  The time that you once spent blogging begins to be filled with other things, and suddenly, it has disappeared from life altogether.  And that isn't necessarily a bad thing... it's just a different thing.  But I find myself being less and less open here, being more and more guarded about who I am, what I'm thinking, what I'm feeling.

There's also that niggling feeling in the back of my head that says, you could start over with an all new blog.  Leave the past baggage behind, start fresh, make different mistakes.  But that doesn't feel right either... I am so attached to so many of my posts, and it would cause my heart to ache if I had to take them down.

This feeling of not knowing if I should move on or not is weighing so heavily on my mind that I completely forgot to share with you guys what happened last weekend, and that really feels like a crime.  Something special, magical, wonderful happened last weekend.

Our family grew by 4 more paws!  People tell us we've officially "failed" at fostering dogs... we just say that we succeeded beyond our wildest dreams in providing a loving, supportive environment for one extra-special chocolate lab.

Who totally believes that he qualifies as a lap dog.

Have a great day!


  1. I am so with you on these heavy feelings. I'll get one creative burst and then nothing. Then I'm essentially just creeping on other people's blogs. Like a creep.

    Hooray for Gunner in the fam! :) I'm so excited and what a sweet picture of the 3 of you!!

  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

  3. Kristen - first of all, HUGE congratulations on your new addition! I recently added one myself, and it has brought so much extra joy to my life already, that I can't even put it into words. Secondly, yes, I too have the heavy feelings. I have them quite frequently. I don't know why I keep going. Usually, something just comes along that gets me excited about blogging again. My blog redesign is the most recent motivator, but it could be any number of things - a new idea I want to share or a question I need answered. But in the last few days, making my blog space a little bit prettier has totally renewed my blogging spark. Now, of course, I DO understand exactly where you're coming from, though - and wouldn't blame you one bit for stepping away. (Not that you need my approval in the least little bit.) I just think that life has to be about what fulfills you and brings you joy, and if that's not blogging anymore, then I'm going to go ahead and throw my unsolicited two cents in, and just simply say - run. If you aren't happy, you should run away and not look back, unless and until you decide that you want to again. But know that I will miss seeing you in my feed! :)

  4. Yea for doggies!!! =) I'm so excited for you!!!! Shirley says she's excited too, but doesn't understand what all the fuss is about. =)

    I have felt just the same way you are feeling - my circumstances were different I'm sure, but I understand. My choice was to delete my blog and reduce my internet presence. I don't miss my blog at all, though I do miss writing some. I love keeping up with blogs, but I really hacked down my bloglovin' list and my daily feed went from 300 to like 40. It feels amazing. Also, an added fringe benefit - more time with Mikey & Shirley. And more time for knitting, which is good since Christmas is coming right along.

    If you do decide to take a break - I'll miss reading you. But I hope we can keep in touch!!!

  5. Hey love! Long lost me here. I just got back from my own personal blogging hiatus. I'm worried that it won't be the same (all of my favorite blogs have either gone stagnant or just are't the same and I have no idea who to read!). But I'm back and honestly, the hiatus was really good for me to clear my head. Maybe it would be good for you, but I can honestly admit that i will miss you. It was nice to see that you are still here doing your thing. I've always loved reading your blog! In fact, I just put your button back up on my blog and fully intend to share you love. So, if you decide to go I'll be happy for you, but selfishly, I will miss you!

  6. chocolate labs are where its at.

    I hear you. I understand your every word. I let a lot of blogging go, and I'm actually so much happier.

    and I too have thought about starting over... we're on the same boat..

  7. Kristen, you read my mind again. I've been feeling the exact same way. I've been getting really picky about what I post and what blogs I follow, and it's really helpful. I've been in such a creative rut. Basically we are in the same boat, as usual.

    YAY for Gunner!!

  8. I'm so happy that you got a puppppy! Gunner is amazing.

    Blogging hasn't quite felt the same to me recently. i feel like a lot of people are either struggling, as you are, or something has changed.

  9. Oh yay!! I'm so happy for you! But why would people say you've failed at fostering?
    Also, we all have those feelings towards blogging at one time or another. I remember feeling like I'd never blog again after I had Mia... and it took me a long time to get back into the groove of it. But I'm glad I decided to stick with it because it's just one big journal for my baby :) Probably annoying to a lot of people but I don't really care!
    You just have to do what's best for you! If it's not fun right now... that's okay! You definitely don't want to force something that just isn't happening for you right now. You know you've got our support ;)

  10. WHAT!! CONGRATS! I think you rock at life now that you've saved this pups life! I am so excited for you, seriously! Dogs are like learning to love someone who can't speak your language, but can love you through their sweet eyes and actions. Also, I'm glad you're staying as a blogger!

  11. Gunner!!!! I love you so much! You and Sherm have got to get together! Sherm is 3 and Gunner is 4, they would go crazy! I just looked back through a gazillion posts to find this one. You need a search bar on this blog, girl! I wanted to search "Gunner" so I could see all his posts and pictures. :) So happy for you guys.

    1. Also, congrats on the marathon and crazy running and looking awesome!! You are such an inspiration!


I love comments! Please let me know how you feel, and make sure I have a way to get back with you, so we can be friends :-)